Alex B Cann Weekly Column - Thursday 29th May

Over the Bank Holiday weekend, I managed to catch up on a couple of things, one of which was “Girl You Know It’s True”, a biopic looking at the rise and fall of Milli Vanilli in 1989. Made by MTV, it was recently shown on BBC2, and is available to watch on iPlayer.

I really felt for Rob Pilatus and Fabrice Morvan as I watched the story unfold, as we learn about their humble beginnings, difficult childhoods, and meteoric rise to stardom. Well, sort of. They signed a deal with Boney M svengali Frank Farian without really reading any of the details, and quickly discovered they weren’t required to do any of the vocals on Girl You Know It’s True.

The song became a monster hit in the UK, USA, and over 20 other countries, and an album soon followed. Whilst Rob and Fabrice weren’t named on the credits of the UK album, their names did appear on the US version. Meanwhile, it became an unspoken secret in the record industry that all wasn’t what it seemed with the boys. Their interviews on TV in broken English led many to question how their voices sounded so different on the record, and the pivotal moment came when a backing track skipped during a ‘live’ performance, leading to them scarpering off stage in embarrassment.

Perhaps the fatal mistake was submitting them for consideration at the Grammys. Somehow, a special exception was made to the usual rule that artists have to perform live, but it was clear there was some disquiet in the industry from the reaction of others watching the ceremony. They saw off competition from the likes of Neneh Cherry and De La Soul to scoop the award.

Their comeback album under their own names subsequently shifted a pitiful 2000 copies worldwide, and further tragedy was to follow, with the death of Rob at just 33 years old, following a battle with drink and drugs. Frank Farian was still around when this biopic was made, but perhaps unsurprisingly refused to make any comment or participate in its making.

I’m not convinced that things have got a lot better in the industry since, with numerous other documentaries spelling out the lack of support for those who are thrust into the limelight. The recent Sky documentary about Boyzone certainly springs to mind. With so much lip-syncing and miming going on in pop music nowadays, it’s a real shame that the real Milli Vanilli were never even given a chance to step up to the microphone. Instead, they lived in constant fear of their secret being exposed. One of pop’s biggest scandals, but more than that, a tragic human story of two lives being chewed up and spat out by the pop music machine.

It’s a real shame, as Blame It On The Rain, Girl I’m Gonna Miss You and Girl You Know It’s True are all decent pop songs. It’s good to see Fabrice is now making music on his own terms. A crazy story.

Meanwhile this week, a study by Cadbury has asked Brits a burning question - should chocolate be kept in the fridge or at room temperature? The results were almost as divisive as a certain other referendum we could mention - 53 per cent prefer their chocolate chilled, whilst 47 per cent favour room temprature. I’m definitely in the former camp, although I would warn you not to stick Curly Wurlys in the freezer. In a memorable moment at a Weight Watchers class a fair few years ago, one lady sheepishly confessed to sticking her chocolate treats in the freezer to prolong their pleasure. Unfortunately, she lost several gnashers whilst nibbling on her Cadbury treat!

Almost as divisive is the issue of keeping tomato ketchup in the fridge, with 48% saying they do this. I’m firmly in the room temperature camp on this one. Why would I want to put cold sauce onto a hot meal? Madness. Other stats from this very important survey include 25 per cent keeping their onions in the fridge, and 70 per cent keeping their mayonnaise cold. If I’m ever Prime Minister, I would allow all of this to happen, but I’d definitely ban all hot food in cinemas, including nachos and hot dogs. Sorry, either go for a meal or watch a film. Some cinemas even deliver hot food to your seat in the middle of a film. Nope, I’m not OK with that. It’s almost as bad as putting your feet on the seats.