“It’s okay to talk about life”: How Mentell is giving men a safe space to talk

On a Monday night at the Grafton Centre in Hyde, a group of men sit quietly in a circle. There’s no small talk about football, no pints in hand, just an orange ball being passed from one person to the next. Whoever holds it has the floor. They speak, and the rest listen.

It’s simple. It’s powerful. And for many, it’s life changing.

This is Mentell - a Stockport-born charity offering men a safe and confidential space to talk, free from advice and judgement. Founded in 2017, Mentell has grown from a small group of seven men in a scout hut to a national movement helping thousands of men across the UK, including right here in Tameside.

“We provide spaces for men to talk about life,” explains Andy Walker, Mentell’s co-founder and director. “There’s no pressure, no fixing, no labels, just listening. At the end of the night, everyone leaves feeling a little bit lighter.”

From a scout hut to a national lifeline

Andy first joined a Mentell group during one of the toughest periods of his life.

“My business was failing, my relationship was breaking down, and there was a family health scare,” he recalls. “I didn’t have anyone to talk to, no male role models, no outlet.”

When a man named Kieran posted on Facebook about starting a men’s talking group in Stockport, Andy was the first to sign up.

“I was nervous walking in that night,” he says. “Seven blokes sitting awkwardly in a circle, no one knew what we were doing. Then one man picked up the ball and shared about losing his partner. I realised he wasn’t talking about death - he was talking about grief. And that grief looked a lot like my own.”

That moment unlocked something in Andy. “I walked out feeling ten stone lighter,” he says. “I knew this was something special, something that could help men like me.”

Eight years on, Mentell has supported over 6,000 men across the UK, with its heartbeat still in the Northwest. In Hyde, where the charity runs weekly circles every Monday at the Grafton Centre, nearly 40% of attendees find Mentell through simple beer mats left in pubs.

“It just shows how powerful community is,” says Andy. “This isn’t just our problem to solve. Everyone: pubs, gyms, businesses, media, has a role to play.”

Hyde circle details. Credit: Mentell

Why men struggle to open up

Ask Andy why so many men find it hard to talk, and his answer is simple: words matter.

“The issue is the word mental health,” he explains. “For a lot of blokes, it sounds like something’s wrong with them. They don’t want to feel broken or labelled. But when we talk about life, that’s something every man understands.”

Andy knows this firsthand. “I didn’t go to a group sooner because I thought my problems weren’t big enough. That’s what we tell ourselves. But for two years, I woke up every day wanting to end my life. I just didn’t think I was ‘ill enough’ to deserve help.”

Through his years running groups in Hyde, Stockport and Glossop, Andy’s seen hundreds of men share similar stories. “Nearly everyone says, ‘I wish I’d come two years earlier.’ We all have our own Mount Everest. Talking about life shouldn’t be something we wait to do until we hit crisis.”

What happens inside a circle

For anyone curious about what actually happens at a Mentell circle, Andy describes it as a mix of warmth, structure, and simplicity.

“From the moment you sign up, you can get a call from one of our volunteers to talk you through what to expect,” he says. “When you arrive, you’ll be welcomed by someone who’s been through it before. We know how scary it can be to walk through that door.”

Once inside, the group runs from 7 to 9pm. There’s a short introduction, a few ground rules - respect, no judgement, no advice - and then the orange ball starts moving.

“Each man has the chance to speak,” Andy explains. “You share as much or as little as you want. No one interrupts. No one tries to fix you. We just listen.”

After a tea break, the circle continues until nine o’clock, ending with a few simple reminders and an invitation to return.

“It’s not therapy. It’s not counselling. It’s connection,” says Andy. “And that’s what so many men are missing.”

Changing the conversation

Mentell’s mission goes beyond support groups, it’s about reshaping how society talks about men’s wellbeing. The charity works with universities, politicians, and local businesses to research, raise awareness, and influence change.

But Andy believes the biggest shift has to start in everyday language.

“For generations, men gathered around fires and shared stories. That’s how we learned, healed, and stayed connected,” he says. “We’ve lost that. We don’t invite the neighbours round anymore. We don’t talk. But deep down, we’re wired for it.”

He laughs, “A bunch of blokes sitting in a circle talking about life, it sounds weird until you do it. Then you realise it’s the most normal thing in the world.”

How you can help

Mentell runs largely on volunteers and donations. Whether it’s hosting a pub quiz, running a marathon, or just spreading the word, every effort counts.

“All of that support goes straight back into opening more groups, training facilitators, and paying for spaces like the Grafton Centre,” Andy says. “But more importantly, you’re flying the flag. You’re saying, ‘I care about men’s wellbeing.’ And that matters.”

A simple message

Asked to sum up Mentell’s message, Andy doesn’t hesitate.

“Sitting in a circle with other men might feel daunting,” he says. “But it’s as normal as going to the gym, eating, or breathing. It’s not weird. It’s not therapy. It’s just men, being human - together.”

For more information on Mentell, and to sign up for your local circle visit: https://www.mentell.org.uk

Andy, co-founder of Mentell. Credit: Mentell